there's something || very damaged about you . . .

[shadowstalker]

Water crackled along rocks, shining as the moon illuminated pale lighting, a perfect reflection being made. Crystal eyes were fixated upon the water, moving and rippling as the river moved. Because of the recent rain, the water had to go somewhere; Shadowstalker guessed that Rush River emptied into a waterfall if one were to travel far enough. His pelt was as black as the darkness around him, making him blend in and look like nothing more than empty space. However, his eyes lacked up for this, giving away his appearance to anybody that happened to be looking.

He enjoyed spending his time all alone when it came to nights. Nights were when his madness seemed to take a turn for the worse and take hold over his mind; the sun almost adored to push those thoughts away. Shadowstalker hardly ever slept, creating a few strange rumors about him during camp. The reason of this was because he simply felt that his body did not need much sleep. The black tom breathed in, letting out a large sigh. RushClan was a home forced upon his shoulders, on that he was sworn to protect though he didn't ask for anything of the sort.

Shaking his head, ears pinned back against his head, he stared up to the moon. Through his insanity and his anguish,

the moon brought a bit of peace.

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[Brindlefrost]

A lone she-cat wandered silently through the woods, her pelt as light as dawn. She had always happened to stand out in the clan, as the coloring on her pelt was like no other. Similar to a calico pattern, gray tabby, yet ginger tabby, yet brown. And to top it all off, she had her thick, fluffy coat. She tried not to thing much about her appearance and simply accepted it, after all, they were just looks, nothing more.

The cat looked around, her icy blue eyes scanning the ground for any sort of movement. She often liked hunting during the night, because although she wasn't the best stalker, her build gave her the advantage of strength, meaning that she could easily catch a nocturnal animal and take it back to the clan for a nice meal. The only problem was finding them. Brindlefrost crept forward, placing one paw gently in front of the other, as though she were lightly gliding across the ground. She had almost reached the edge of the forest when she heard the 'hurr' of the river.

Completely forgetting about her original goal, she sprung up from her stalk-like position and trotted over to the water. Fishing. Swimming. Two things she could do and loved to do. And even if it was in the middle of the night, there was never a wrong time for such activities. But as she watched the river run downstream, she noticed something by the water. A very dark figure, that fit in with the shadows. She could just barely make out a pair of ears and a long, sleek-looking tail.

A cat! Brindlefrost hesitantly padded forward, her head cocked to the side. It took her until she was right beside the cat to realize who it was. "Shadowstalker...so the rumors are true? You don't sleep, do you?" she asked quietly.

[shadowstalker]

On top of the noise that overwhelmed him, the pattering of the river, Shadowstalker was able to pick up the soft padding of footsteps upon the rocky riverbank. He blinked a few times before finally turning. Her pelt was bright and almost made him want to jump back from the sudden shock of it. He had seen this she-cat around the camp before.. But he wasn't one to take much interest in anybody. He turned away slowly and looked down at the water.

But, it seemed as though, even through his shadow facade, he had been spotted by her. His ears flicked a few times as he took in the words.

Shadowstalker... So the rumors are true? You don't sleep, do you?

He almost laughed at her. "So the whole Clan thinks I'm some sort of super cat that doesn't require any sleep?" The black tom smiled softly at her, though his crystal eyes were a bit mischievous. "I require at least a bit of sleep, you know. I just don't sleep as much as the average cat, is all. And when I do, I come out here because I enjoy the sound of the river. It's like a lullaby, don't you think?"

He tilted his head as he looked up at the moon. "And every night it feels like the moon tells me a story, though it can't speak. Even if I can't hear it, I always listen." His words might have seemed meaningless to those who did not look in depth, but for somebody that payed close attention to things such as what he was implying, though his mind hadn't even gotten that far, was that he was lonely.

His eyes did not stray from the water. "Your name is Brindlefrost..." He said it aloud. "Don't you find it slightly odd how your first words to me were revolved around a rumor?" He smirked. "But that's alright."

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[Brindlefrost]

Brindlefrost pricked her ears up at the question. "Well, I don't think that it's a bad thing, nor do I think you are a super cat. You are just kind of stand-offish. Try talking to other cat's once and awhile. We aren't too bad, y'know?" she meowed lightly, chuckling. Shadowstalker's words were strange, but in a way they soothed her ears. It was as though he were talking in riddles.

"You know, that is one thing I like about the clan; the river. Everything about it too. Most others make fun of me because I don't seem too cat like, swimming in a river. But I see nothing wrong with becoming one with the currents, allowing the water to sooth your skin." the she-cat spoke fondly of the glistening water, and she gently set her paw on top of the river, the water soon lapping at it and wetting her fur.

"Every cat is different in their own way, and no cat will ever see things the same way as another." Her bright eyes closed and Brindlefrost focused on her surroundings. The river rushing around her paw, the moon glowing upon her fur, and a very light breeze running through her pelt, ruffling her fur. After another second, she opened her eyes. "The world can be quite beautiful, eh?"

[shadowstalker]

The views that this cat had upon the world.. It was almost like what he had. However, he did let out a small growl at her first remark.

"It's not that at all." It was more curt and stronger than he would have wanted, but once it was said there was no taking it back, so he didn't even try. He hoped to StarClan, if there really was such a place, that she wouldn't question him. But, he had moved onto the different topic with her.
"Most cats are too caught up in their own world to notice it, surely." Shadowstalker smiled softly over at Brindlefrost; a friend, maybe? Just possibly? Somebody that he could rely on? No.. No he couldn't trust anybody... But what if she-

[red]No! She'll be a traitor, just like your father was to you... Kill her now and save yourself of hurt later...[/red]

His blue eyes widened and his claws unsheathed; he caught himself early, however. The large male shook his head quickly and breathed heavily, though quietly, in hopes of not drawing attention to himself. The last thing he needed was his only "friend" to figure out just what he was going through on a daily basis.
"It is pretty amazing, isn't it?" He mused, noticing that she was dipping her paw into the water.

"Brindlefrost?" He waited until he got a response to suddenly rise to his paws, revealing his full height to her up close. He was a tall cat, a tall, strong cat which had obviously done some battling despite his early age in the warrior standards. "Let's go hunting." He smiled to her, turning and walking near the forest, tail flowing from side to side as he walked, feeling the she-cat's presence close to him.

It was a good feeling, he had to admit.

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[Brindlefrost]

The black cat seemed more relaxed, insisting that they go hunting. Oh yeah! That's what I was doing to begin with, I guess... Brindlefrost thought to herself. she brought her paw back to solid ground, shaking some of the water off of it, and she got up to follow the other. As they neared the forest, she inhaled deeply. That was another thing she loved; the smell of the leaves, the grass, and the few pine trees that there were scattered throughout the outskirts of RushClan territory.

Under the trees, it was even easier for the two cats to hide themselves, as the leaves on the trees blocked the moon's milky rays. On the ground, soft grass cushioned their pawsteps, they were completely silent. The only thing that could be heard was a faint trickle of water, as well as the light breeze that rustled the leaves. Otherwise, the forest was quiet, as though it were sleeping along with the creatures it inhabited.

Brindlefrost stopped dead in her tracks as she heard a pattering that was ever so faint. Some sort of animal, not to big, but the size of prey. She sniffed the air and picked up the scent of mouse. Heh, someone is out later than they should be, huh? she thought to herself. Crouching down low, the she-cat pinpointed the mouse's location and began to creep forward. Luckily, they were downwind of the prey, and they could not be detected.

Step. Step. Step. She was only a few tail-lengths away from the mouse then. Smirking, she pounced, catching the tiny creature before it could escape. As she did so, she heard the cry of an owl overhead, and though she could not understand it, she understood one thing: it had set it's sights on the mouse and was not happy that a cat and gotten to it's dinner first.

[shadowstalker]

The lively she-cat seemed to have obviously picked up the scent of the mouse. Shadowstalker had gotten it, but had decided to wait, wanting to see how this cat hunted in the middle of night. Her pelt was bright and she was easy to spot her from what seemed like a mile away. Of course he wouldn't say anything about it, but it was strange for a cat to look like her be skilled in such a nighttime fashion. In a certain way, Shadowstalker admired it.

She had caught it swiftly, the dramatic cry from an owl sounding overhead. This made the tom laugh softly, but he then sat down in the grass, bowing his head to Brindlefrost in congratulation.
"I'm impressed." He cooed out, getting back to his paws. Shadowstalker opened his mouth and breathed in through his nose and jaws simultaneously, enjoying the scents of the forest. But, a scent of a different piece of pray hit him. A shrew, it seemed to be. Through all of his time alone, he had learned to distinguish a large amount of pray from just their scent, though it would completely impossible to learn everything about this territory, no matter how many proud cats say that they indeed know every secret, ever nook in this forest.

Though the trees were spaced out perfectly, it was still a lightly packed forest; without a sense of smell, it would be easy to get lost. Shadowstalker's body hunched down to the ground, walking into a shadowed area. He was showing Brindlefrost just how it was he got his name. His whole body seemed to meld in with them, his eyes shielded because of the way he was facing to her. The tom's large paw landed down perfectly upon the small piece of prey after he jumped, teeth sinking into the creature's neck to kill it. It was a fun pass-time, hunting with this she-cat.

Shadowstalker emerged from the pitch black darkness, blinking his crystal eyes a few times after setting the shrew down beside the mouse; the smell of them made his mouth water, but he said or did nothing to comply to his desire for food.
"I told myself that I wasn't going to ask you this because it would seem rude of me," He began, smiling a gentle, warm smile. "But why is somebody like you, one that looks so adjusted to day, seeming to be favoring the night?"

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[Brindlefrost]

After both cats had caught a piece of prey, they sat down for a moment. The multi-colored she-cat was caught off guard by the tom's question. She tilted her head and looked at him, her icy eyes filled with curiosity, but Shadowstalker's eyes showed the same thing, with a little added confusion.

Brindlefrost thought carefully and her reply was a bit hesitant. "Well..it is true, I fit in with the daytime brightness, and not only because of my pelt, but because of my cheery personality as well, but there is more to it than that, I guess. I don't really favor any time of the day," she meowed with a shrug.

She paused, lifting her chin high and opening her eyes wide, so that she could see not only the canopy of leaves above her, but the light from the moon that managed to squeeze in between the leaves. "While the day is bright and social, and the perfect time to go swimming, being able to feel the heat of the sun beat down on you and warm your fur. The night is the complete opposite. It offers time to think, peace and quiet. Rather than a time to be alone though, I believe it is the perfect time for not only contemplation, but adventure. Yeah, I said it. I really still act like a kit, huh? That's all my life has ever been, is finding new adventures and doing things no cat has ever done, finding things no cat has ever found..." Brindlefrost trailed off and stared at the ground, a weak smile on her face. She had indeed been made fun of and yelled at for her wandering mind. As an apprentice, she had had two mentors. The first one she had once got fed up with her and called her an insufferable being and refused to teach her. Though she had never really liked him and he died not too long after that, the words had always stuck with her, they had hurt her a lot. But, she just couldn't help it..

[shadowstalker]

Shadowstalker's ears were straight as he listened to what she had to say. It was a strange story, one that he would remember very clearly. Two mentors.. Very strange. Back when he was an apprentice, it was much easier to hide what was really going on his mind because he was more of a one-track personality.. But now he was a struggling, pained personality.
"When I was little-" He was going to speak of how he and his father never got along. His eyes shot open and he stared at the ground, mouth gaped a bit. His pupils lessened in size as he shook a bit with fear.

"Mama! Mama!"
Her eyes.. They were looking straight at his small body.
"[pink]Sh-...Shadow... I-I lo-...Love... y-...Y-...[/pink]"

Her head fell to the overly hot tar of the road, blood leaking from her tongue, air smelling of harsh iron being cooked by the sun. Shadow shook, his fragile, frail, kitten body trembling badly. His side ached from where his mother had shoved him out of the way, the car holding its humans already long gone in the distance. How cruel they were.. How cruel..

"M-Mama...? Wake up, Mama...!" He cried, pushing his nose into her fur, blood seeping into his muzzle. "You gotta get up..." His small voice choked out, poking her with his paw, tears falling from his tiny, crystal eyes. "We gotta g-go home..."

He suddenly got to his paws and hastily walked away, jaw clenched. "I... I have to go. Sorry." His voice was pushed out forcefully, choking and agonizing to him. Shadowstalker pressed past the foliage.

Another night. Another damn night..

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[Brindlefrost]

The she-cat watched Shadowstalker, her eyes full of concern. He was fine one moment, and the next he seemed to be having something similar to a panic attack. Yet, the whole time he never spoke a single word. What..what is happening? I guess there must've been something very horrible that happened in his past...

The moment he seemed to recover, the black tom insisted that he had to go and rushed away, leaving his mouse behind. "Hey!" Brindlefrost leaped to her feet, calling after him. When he didn't respond and showed no signs of coming back, the cat he had left scowled and quickly buried the prey that they had caught. After the dead vermin were safely tucked away under a mound of dirt, she was quick to follow after Shadowstalker.

As she tracked and followed him, she resisted the urge to call out. Instead, she was silently speeding through the forest, hot on his trail. He hadn't gotten the chance to get too far in the first place and she could sense him up ahead. Without thinking, Brindlefrost jumped. She landed on a ball of fur, and the cat gave way under her weight. "Oops..." she murmured, getting off of the tom. "I didn't mean to really do that..I wasn't thinking. But you can't just go running off like that! I won't let you. I am not saying you have to explain yourself either though. Just...let me keep you company until you feel like going back to camp, ok?"

[shadowstalker]

His gaze had turned from sorrow and despair to a glint of anger, rage burning deep in the light, blue color that adorned his eyes. His tail was flickering back and forth, claws unsheathing; kill something. Anything. Just take the life of something so they can feel his anguish.. Killing was his way of lamenting.

Shadowstalker had stopped all movements for a second, ears pinning back against his skull. He sat down, tail curling up around his feet; his head hung low on his shoulders. He closed his eyes and basked in his pain, shaking just as he did when he was a kit. A cat should have gotten over something like this by now, but he didn't. He couldn't.

He howled in surprise when a cat suddenly fell on top of him; he took in the scent before he turned around. Once recognized as Brindlefrost, he scowled at her with a hiss. However, his expression softened when he listened to her words. His intentions. He barely knew what they were anymore. What did he want to do in RushClan, what did he want his future to be. He didn't live in the future or even in the present.

"Mama..." He whispered, not looking at Brindlefrost, but allowing his head to hang low again, face shadowed over. "She's dead... Because of me.." His claws pressed into the dirt and he scowled, beginning to shake again. Perhaps it really was time to admit this to somebody. A single soul, that's all.

"I was small. I didn't know what a car was. A.. monster. On the thunderpath." He said his words very choppily, not being in any position to form articulate sentences. His voice shook just as his body. "She pushed me out of the way and... And she.. Died. He hated me after that... Told me he'd kill me if he ever saw me again. I almost starved in the forest before I was found.. By this Clan."

He slowly lifted his head, his eyes wide and a dark smile on his face, staring directly at her. "So, am I odd? Yes. Yes I am. Am I deranged..? More than I should be.. I have no mind. If I do it's bleeding against my skull and slowly dying, just like I am. You see? Brindlefrost? Do you see how horrible I am, now?" He laughed. Sickly. "Because she's dead, everybody is going to die. Everybody."

His head fell back down and his shook, lessening in size, it looked like.

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[Brindlefrost]

The she-cat listened carefully to his every word. His mother..how terrible...But was that really his fault? Though Shadowstalker, talked hatefully about himself, the other cat cared to disagree. But for the moment, she just sat there, trying to take in all that he had said. Talk about a messed up childhood.. She thought, a somber smile on her face.

After a moment of complete silence, Brindlefrost stepped forward and sat directly in front of the tom. Gently, she nuzzled his cheek. She spoke softly, breathing lightly into his ear. "I see nothing horrible about a cat, who has suffered great losses. Of course you blame yourself, I can understand that. But, it had to have been the will of StarClan. If...if Horsestar is ever to ask me to be his deputy again, I will accept it, and the day I become closer to StarClan, I will bring you with me, and we'll find her, I'm sure she's there somewhere."

Passion flooded her voice, enough so that it was hard for her to maintain her whisper. "And as for this father of yours, well, any father that thinks ill of their own child for such an accident..is no father at all!" Brindlefrost met the black cat's gaze, their faces not even a whisker-length apart. "You are not a cat that deserves to suffer, but a cat that deserves happiness. And I will see to that happiness. I will stay beside you, if that makes you happy, and no, I do not do this out of pity. I do this because I know you deserve it."

[shadowstalker]

The cat had situated herself directly in front of his form, causing him to look up. He was a little surprised from how close she was, but he wasn't against it. Words fell from her mouth, words that made him lift his head, expression agonized. The thought of being able to finally see his mother again in this StarClan place.. He knew nothing about it, but if it gave him a chance to see his passed mother yet again..

Tears welled up in his icy eyes, staring directly into a matching, blue pair.

no father at all...

Shadowstalker let out a loud meow of despair, suddenly moving forward and nuzzling into her neck, his shaking body finding a sense of calmness as her warmth faded through his fur and hit his skin. Slowly, his trembling slowed and eventually the black cat began to continue to nuzzle into her, finding such comforting warmth... Such a wonderful feeling it was to finally feel consoled...

"Brindlefrost... Thank you..." He smiled, closing his eyes and smiling into her fur.

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[Brindlefrost]

Brindlefrost purred, and could not resist licking the top of his head. "There really is no need to thank me. I just happen to be one of the first cats to console with you; I am sure if it were anything else, they would have done what they saw necessary, something similar as to what I decided to do. No one likes to see a fellow clanmate in pain, no matter what," the she-cat's words remained soft, as though they drifted through the air on a feather.

There was silence in the forest for a brief second, and the brindle cat could not resist taking in Shadowstalker's scent, as though to analyze or curb her curiosity. His scent was not bitter, rather it was comforting. He smelled somewhat of pine trees, which made sense to her. For he was a lonely pine tree among a bunch of firs.

She drew herself away from the dark cat and smiled at him. "What would you like to do? We have the prey from earlier, and if you want we can go and collect it and take it back to camp. Or we could always continue to hunt..anything you want. You tell me." Her icy blue eyes, full of expectancy, met his, and neither of their gazes wavered. Brindlefrost probably could have comforted him for longer, but she always believed that it was better to suffer, and move on, then to stay and get left behind in your own troubles.